Monday, March 18, 2013

Choosing Your Response: A Thought Catalogue


Ever feel like the whole world is conspiring against you?  Yeah, me too.  It’s totally nutso but every so often there are those moments where it’s like “Really?”, “Is this REALLY my life?”,  “There’s no way this shit just happens, there must be some bigger plot.”

Deep breaths.

More deep breaths.

AAAAAHHHHH!!!! 

DEEP BREATHS.  In….and out….

Only you can choose your happiness.  Shit happens… and happens… and happens.  But you have to continue to stand up and say, I will chose the positive response.  I will learn from this experience and move forward stronger and smarter.

F**** my life!

DEEP BREATHS.  In…and out…

Yes, there are setbacks.  Doubts.  Despair even. 

You can’t choose what happens to you but you can choose how you react.  So if you encounter catastrophe or even a minor setback- financially, spiritually, emotionally, etc- I encourage you to step back, breathe, and rebuild from a place of greater and wiser power.

Friday, March 15, 2013

Excuses.


I haven’t posted in a while.  I recently got a fantastic gig that ate up just about every free moment of my last few weeks.  Yes, I’m making excuses.

On the one hand, it was wonderful to have work and make some real money.  On the other hand, I noticed how much I deferred my own projects and dreams. 

I see it happen with my friends (mostly actors in New York) all the time.   Everyone is so committed to their day job, what they’re doing just to get by, that they wipe themselves out and don’t make it to auditions or class or networking events.  For some reason we feel so much more committed to our survival job schedule than our reason for being here in the first place.

I recall a morning when I had to go work the breakfast shift at a restaurant.  I got up at 5am and got myself on the bus, reluctantly, but I did it.  I remember thinking; I wouldn’t do this for an audition.  I wouldn’t do this for my own goals, but I’ll do it for someone else.  It seemed so backwards.

Fast-forward two years and the same thing is happening.  This Wednesday I finally had a day off after two weeks of non-stop work.  I did nothing.  I had put my goals on hold to work for someone else, and when I had the time to execute them, I didn’t.  I negotiated with myself.  I procrastinated.




Why can’t I prioritize the work and goals I set for myself the way I unquestioningly execute the work I do for others?   Everyone does it.  Whether it be career goals like being a working actor or personal goals like writing a blog or working out.  When it comes to ourselves, we defer and make excuses.

It’s hard, but I think we need to endow our own dreams with the same importance and respect that we give to others.  I see too many brilliant people get so caught up in working for someone or something else that they lose sight of themselves. 

So here I am.  Committing to myself.  You can hold me accountable.  There will be weekly posts.  There will be a redesign.  There will be a giveaway.  There will be social media interaction.  There will be growth.   

Now what will you commit to?  And who will hold you accountable?

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

The New MetroCard: What You Need to Know


Fares are up all around.  Here’s a cheat sheet to help you decide if your usual MetroCard purchase is still the best value for your needs.



Base Fare: $2.50

30 Day Unlimited: $112

Is it worth it?  You must ride the subway 48 times in 30 days for this card to be worthwhile.  That’s two rides per work day and eight on the weekend.  If you’re not anticipating that much travel, stick with a pay per ride card.

7 Day Unlimited: $30

Is it worth it?  You must ride the subway 13 times in 7 days for this card to be worthwhile.  Again, If you’re not anticipating that much travel, stick with a pay per ride card.

Pay Per Ride

The pay per ride bonuses are dropping from 7% to 5%.  If you want your card bonus to work out to an exact amount of rides, purchase a $50 metro card and your balance will return to zero rather than 75 cents or some other awkward amount.

** If you want to get your balance down to zero, you can put your card in the machine and select “Other Amounts”.  Manually type in the difference needed to get to the base fare of $2.50.

NEW CHARGE!  $1 fee for every new MetroCard you buy! 
Time to start refilling your old MetroCards. If your old card is damaged or expired (they expire every two years), go to the window and turn it in for a new one free of charge.

Times to Reconsider Your Usual MetroCard Purchase:
-       -  When you’re scheduled to leave town for more than a couple of days.  If you wind up with an extra week or even an extra day or two on your unlimited, pass it off to a friend or someone on the street.  They’ll appreciate it.

-       - If your commute changes.  New job.  New apartment.  New locations.  Will it change the frequency with which you’ll be taking the train?
-      - If your schedule changes.  Working freelance and things are quiet?  Maybe opt for a pay per ride for “as needed” trips and spend some time building your business from home.

-      - If the weather changes.  As temperatures start to rise and we enjoy a few glorious spring months you may want to opt for walking (if it’s a possibility) or biking more often.

For additional information about the new fares visit the MTA’s site. 

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

NYC FREE FIND: The Times Square Visitors Center Wishing Wall



I don’t know about you, but around this time of year I start losing sight of the many resolutions I made at New Years.  The reality and routine of life combined with the endlessness of winter dull my motivation to do just about anything other than sit in front of the television and watch marathons of “Downton Abbey” and “Girls”.


But last week I discovered a little New York gem that renewed my spirit.  In the heart of Times Square I came upon a Wishing Wall.  Tiny squares of colorful paper with the wishes of people from all over the world tacked up to be shared.  After reading thru many lotto winner hopefuls and love seekers I wanted to add my own dreams to the bunch.  I grabbed a slip of pink paper and wrote in big, bold letters my biggest, boldest dreams.  I put them in a box with the other wishes of the day to be added to the wall and eventually released over Times Square in the celebratory moment that is midnight of the New Year.  That’s what becomes of the wishing wall.  At the end of each year, all the wishes are collected to be released as the confetti over Times Square that signal the start of a New Year and a new wish.


Something about adding my wish to the collective and having it be a part of that moment really resonated with me and renewed my sense of commitment to my resolutions.  Anything that can reconnect you with your goals is a powerful tool and one that we all need to check in with from time to time.  Luckily, I’ve found mine and thankfully, there’s no limit to the wishes you can make.  I expect I’ll be back at the wishing wall again soon, sharing my dreams and reaffirming the commitments I’ve made to myself.

Happy Dreaming.



The Times Square Visitors Center is  located at 1560 Broadway New York, NY 10036
Open 7 days a week. 8am-8pm


Thursday, February 21, 2013

You CAN Always Get What You Want


Last night my girlfriends and I went out to celebrate a very special birthday.  I knew I’d be splurging a bit so I checked out the menu online before heading out. I wanted to have an idea of how much I’d be spending.  I settled on a moderately priced mushroom ravioli but when I got to the restaurant the price was 20% more than the price listed online. 

Sure, in the scheme of things it was only an additional $3, but then I got to thinking; If everyone’s dish was 20% more at the restaurant than online, that’d be a hugely substantial increase- especially with a party of 10. 

I pulled up the restaurant’s site on my phone and pointed out the discrepancy to the manager.  We wound up with a table full of complimentary desserts that night.



            
The point here isn’t to score free stuff, but to speak up when there’s a misrepresentation or a mistake.
            
While I’ve enjoyed refunds, free replacements, complimentary gift cards, and as of last night, free desserts, I only like to say something if I feel there’s a legitimate complaint to be made.  I don’t seek to take advantage of a business, but I also don’t want a business to take advantage of me- even unintentionally.

As a kid I was always mortified when my mom complained.  So for a long time I let myself get screwed over when things weren’t as advertised or a service wasn’t up to par or when something wasn’t what I asked for or ordered.  But over the years I’ve learned that silence isn’t always golden and it’s worth it to speak up.  So next time something seems off or you’re less than pleased, kindly point it out and ask for what you deserve- 100% satisfaction.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

What Women Want.



It’s not necessarily the flowers or the chocolates or the fancy bottle of wine, it’s what went into getting it.  You were thinking of me and went out of your way to do something for me.  The value of that isn’t reflected in the price of the gift but in the thought and effort that went into it.

That’s what women want.

To be valued.  Not monetarily but in time and in thought.  Here are some totally free ways to show your love everyday.


Communicate.  Women want to be loved.  They want to be shown that and they want to be told that.  Even if you say it all the time, say it more and say why. 

Appreciate.  Women love to take care of others.  Let them know that you recognize their efforts and appreciate them.   Say thank you.


Listen.  Women want to be heard.  If they mention something repeatedly, make a mental note.  When you have the opportunity to act on it, they’ll be thrilled you cared enough to remember.

Prioritize.   Women prioritize love.  Show your love by doing the same.  Turn off the computer, the videogames, the cell phone, the television, the big game, whatever and reciprocate the attention, the time, and the love they give you.

Finding and growing love comes free.  The flowers and paraphernalia are just some fun extras.


Sunday, February 10, 2013

Automate Your Life


… Or at least your budget.  If you’re one of those people who are “allergic” to budgeting I challenge you to take one day to set up some basic accounts and automate your financial life.  Instead of stressing out about how to set aside money each time a paycheck comes in, or worse, blowing your paycheck each week, let the power of automation help you.

You can automate based on whatever budget you like.  There are many arguments to be made for the best budgeting plan, but what’s most important is that you put SOME plan in place.  For the purposes of simplicity and getting started I’m going to suggest a fairly simple plan.  You can set up as many separate accounts as you like or need as you get the hang of things or find certain new categories in your life that you’d like to fund (for example, an account for your children), but for now let’s keep it simple.


Expense Account
-       55% of each paycheck.
-       Held in a checking account.
-       Covers fixed monthly expenses (rent, utilities, food, insurance, etc).

* If your expenses are more than 55% of your take home pay that’s a big red flag.  You are living beyond your means and you need to take some time to reassess and see where you can cut back.  Read through some other “broke and beautiful” posts for ideas.

Emergency Fund
-       10% of each paycheck until maxed out (six to one year of living expenses).
-       Held in a high yield (preferably online) savings account.
-       Covers unexpected expenses (medical bills, loss of job, car breakdown, etc).
-       Once this fund is maxed out, this money can be allocated to other accounts (I recommend retirement (specifically in the form of a ROTH IRA) or long term savings/debt).

Retirement Account
-       10% of each paycheck.
-       Held either through your employer in a 401k or your own retirement fund (I recommend a ROTH IRA) through a reputable brokerage firm (ING, Vanguard, Schwab, etc).
-       Covers retirement.  Not to be drawn from until then.

Debt Payment/Long Term Savings Account
-       10% of each paycheck.
-       Gets paid directly to credit card, student loans, or any other debt; or deposited in a high yield (preferably online) savings account.
-       Covers debt payments and long-term savings goals (down payment for a home or car, savings for a major renovation, etc).

Play Account
-       10% of each paycheck.
-       Held in a checking account.
-       Covers dining out, entertainment, hobbies, indulgences, vacations, etc.

Giving Account
-       5% of each paycheck.
-       Held in a checking or easily accessible savings account.
-       Covers gifts and charitable donations.



Now that we’ve established a sample budget structure let’s talk about automation.

1.     If you haven’t already set up direct deposit through your employer do so today.  Deposit your paychecks and any other forms of income into your expense account.  Make sure you’ve established online access to this account as this is how you’re going to set up the remainder of your automation.

2.     Set up automatic bill pay from your expense account for any monthly bills you can pay online.  (Cable, mortgage, etc).

3.     Open an account for each of the categories above at the recommended institutions (bank, employer, or brokerage).  Be sure to establish online access. 

* You don’t even need to go to the bank to open an account.  Everything can be done online or over the phone.

4.     From your Expense Account (the place where all income is collected/deposited) start automatic transfers through the Transfers and Payments page of your banks‘ site to the rest of your accounts.

For Internal Accounts  (held at the same bank) Choose:

-       From (Your checking  “expenses” account).
-       To (the appropriate account (“play”, “give”, etc)).
-       Amount (10% or 5% of your typical paycheck depending on which account).
-       Frequency (However often you get paid).
*If you freelance or have variable income, make transfers bi-weekly or monthly based on your overall income for that month.


 For External Accounts (held at a different bank or brokerage) Choose:

-       Add external account (enter account number, routing number, bank information).
-       Verify external account.
-       Set up automation as described above (under internal accounts).


Each bank will have a slightly different way of automating, but they all follow roughly the same format.  Adapt as necessary. 

Once you’ve automated you’ll know exactly how much money you have to “play” or “give”, etc.  The automation will force you into moderation and not overspending all the time.  It will also force you to take responsible action towards retirement and long-term savings goals.  Depending on your budgeting plan and financial goals you can adjust the percentages, amounts, and frequency with which you deposit into each account. 

I know it’s a lot and can seem overwhelming, but take the time.  It’s worth it.  Set aside this one day to work through setting up each account and watch your financial goals become reality in the future- automatically.